Saturday, August 1, 2009

cake.

Plot: me and ditse having dinner at red ribbon glorietta.

Ditse: sarap ng cake mo (oreo cake etc etc)
Me: yung sayo parang sumasabong sa lasa. (choc mousse) yung akin moist cake mejo mild
D: favorite ni beb to eh.
Me: *thinks* si billy favorite black forest
D: eh ang pait nun eh
Me: parang ako.
Me and D: BITTER!

tangina. ahaha :))


just so you know. i miss you.
and oh. no not you. him :D

love. oh love.

Platonic Love

*friendship
*not sexual
*caring
*doing thing together
*not physical
*supportive
*enjoy each other's company
*feel relaxed with the person
*happiness
*helping the person
*normal behavior
*sharing
*trust
*contentment
*feel free to talk about anything
*being reliable
*respect

(re posted from pudi's blog.)

platonic love is best described by you and your male bestfriend's bond, which is often called slang of "walang malisya".

but how do you differ it from PSEUDORELATIONSHIP?
napaisip ako first time i recieved a (sour) quote-notice text spreading in and out of the metro

Pseudo means SPURIOUS, SHAM simply not genuine:
false + relationship is equal to so what we called....
pseudo-relationship. Pseudo boyfriends, girlfriends, flings, fake, pirated. Other called it M.U. or mutual understanding. Almost like a relationship but not quite. It is phase where the persons involved are more than friends, but not quite lovers. It is also possible that you both had a verbal agreement or maybe not. One or both of you may have admitted your feelings to either one of you. Maybe you just let your gesture do the talking. There is no formal courtship or what so ever, both of you just decided to be together for the same reasons. You both acted like as if it was a real thing. But sometimes the pseudo-relationship may turn into a reality.-noel of http://my.opera.com/mynoel/albums/

more exciting than a fling
more demanding than casual dating
but always always less fullfilling.

PSEUDO means false.
therefore, its a false relationship

favored by those who always settles for the less future-concentrated people.

flavored by those who have suicidal tendencies. (HAHA)

sometimes, its just mere expectations.
the other part may be:
a.) playing
b.) a pussy (SCARED. tangina. torpe)
c.) too nice.
d.) gay.

its bitter when it ends, for those who expected, or those who found themselves settling.

very human. man are made to put on affection, but its holy when others chose to put their head on first before stepping and doing things to make it right.

also some are stupid enough to actually go for it.It seems a pretty desperate move to have to accept it

Friday, June 26, 2009

artsyfartsy.



cant just art be stuck with me like a virus? my nose's so runny. eew.
i really want to blog right now.

i hope my head gets clear. im having things to say; my head's a mess.

world's so unfair. just when ur making plans and looking for a far better present, the whole world stops and suck you stuck dead with past.

im having this. and it sucks. awfully. ver ver.

im a good girl.

and my drug-er friend's really lucky rich (he's like winning lottery every day)
i hope i couldve dare myself to do drugs or something, then i couldve been lucky, OR WATEVER soooo explaining again.

blog's not theraphy-ing me to this.

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

inuk.boi.

i want to keep you. leche ka.

wag kang anti social.

nah. suit urself.

mahhunt din kita. stalker ako. professional by ass.

:P

Saturday, June 6, 2009

tub.

aj: sige maliligo na ko para pag naglaro ako mabango me.
aiwa: sabay us*smiley*
aj: magbboxers ako para hindi mahalay.
aiwa: (?!) what the heck. pause. HAHA. halay pa. sabay lng naman d q snabing magkasama.
aj: malay ko bang di ka naliligo sa kalye.
aiwa: more (????) then gets it. nway ssbayan na kita sa ivory tub ko with jasmine bath bubbles and scented sandal wood candles <3>
aj: i could (verb word here sorry nkalmtan ko. like, uhhh, acquire?) a tub and baths.
aiwa: u cant. u dont even have a tub and afford it even the essentials. fail

okay. bnlog ko to kasi i think its fun. FUN DISSING/PISSING aj over sms exchanges. BOORING. i know. i had no effing energy to write my whole week to my planner (or slight diary-journal-ish so it wont sound cheesy. planner.) because it came out horrible.

ive wasted my money buying cigarette packs because i was always leaving one best named 'the wish stick" which never granted anything i hoped for all summer.
" A better summer. a good one" i planted my wish to burn.

im still indenial of the whole horrible stuffs. im making my self happily insane with sleeping on different homes everyday, dreaming of exes (stupid involuntary brain move) and 3 reading books at the same time.

though i had stopped taking sleeping drugs, the hallucinations stayed.
everything now went like a nightmare.

Sunday, May 17, 2009

things.

YAY IM BORED! [got this from macci. FUN EH!]

Ten things you wish you could SAY (don't tell us who it is)
1. You forgot about the dreams we made since we learned how to have one. but what the heck, all i can do now is to accept things. goodluck with that. i still have your back no matter what.i do love you. i love you more than anyone else i guess :)
2. I love you. I wish i could spell it to you more often. i do not know why i sometimes feel like i dont. (-_-)
3. One hell of a bullshit you are. just go and run to your deary now since you cant keep the words you have had me. I wont help you find the shoes you want now. and i wont listen to your rants. i had enough.
4. IM SORRY. i dont know why solitude felt so good that mobiles makes me sick.
5. I miss you more than ever. and i want you back. the heck, i cant i know you dont want me na e. and i need my pride and my sane self i guess but i want to go home to you. oh deary i sound so cheesy i wish i can say this to you.
6. Sometimes i dont get you. Oh well, everyone's have their pretty weird self. but i want to know you more :) our talks arent enough
7. YOURE MY STAR! you make me perfectest afternoon AND save me from insanity and thinking imaturely deep everynight. iloveyou :) adopt me please
8. EEE. im so curious i want to know you really. can i keep you? :)
9. Im sorry if im confused or whatever right now. please dont hate me. i just need to clear myself and have coffee with you. er. please sing for me.
10. YOU! BABASAGIN KO BALLS MO! [you know who you are. iloveyou :)]
Nine things about YOURSELF:
1. I eat alot and throw up alot
2. I have an abnormal body clock
3. Im numb. i think
4. Im inlove with morrocan mint tea lattes
5. Im a chain smoker
6. I love bananas and hates it the same. (i cant chichi eh)
7. I now love atozzio im loving the slow rnbs :)
8. Im trying to be Gustav Klimt and Egon Schiele. TRYYYYIIIINg SOOOO HARD.
9. I cant remember
Eight ways to WIN your heart:
1. Have me a good convo. {i dont need bolas though} but dont be good enough to make you my KUYA.
2. Dont flirt back when i do until i say i love you.
3. Dont stalk me.
4. Bring me somewhere. i want dates that includes roadtripping ala GTA :P
5. Spoil me though im telling u not to [its a bluff]
6. Let me spoil you the same. and appreciate it. AND PAKIPOT-ish appreciation pla.
7. NEVER EVER stop me from doing things.
8. Be hard to get. makes me fall everyday eh.
Seven things that cross your mind a lot through the day:
1. honestly? OMG i need to level this thingy first before bebe wakes up (HAHA i know you dont get it)
2. will i eat?
3. i will do this that...
4. but my lethargic body's not moving oh no. zzzz
5. i smoke too much. and im smoking again.
6. omg i miss you. why?
7. where's my fone again?
Six little STUPID things you want to happen to you before you die:
1. say goodbyes
2. go to church and have the longest prayer. not stupid pero i want eh!
3. EAT LIKE CRAZY. the diet had stopped me from eating good food.
4. YOU.I will kiss you very passionately that will make you kneel at me. HAHA!
5. BE WITH EVERYONE. ah no this is not stupid. MAKE EVERYONE PLEASE ME. haha
6. burn beato. >:D
Five turn offs:
1. talks too loud, too much
2. BORING
3. BROKE
4. smokes too much
5. faker.[or i think]
Four turn ons:
1. i know how to have fun. aha aha.
2. im good with ukays! [new talent]
3. I uplift pretty well. ^__^
4. im sweet! [i think]
Three smiles that describe your life:
1. :D
2.^___^
3. ';...;' or >:D
Two things you wish you never did:
1. Fell in love too much
2. learn how to smoke
One confession
I do loser-ish things now because IM BORED!!! atleast im good *wink wink*

Friday, May 8, 2009

its 6 and a half in the morning and i havent had any sleep yet.fuck you wifi. bumukas ka.

im currently filling my heavy head with jivvy no feel good songs since lulling songs tend to make me emo than any better.

it kinda makes me up when i think i need to dine on a hefty dosage of sleeping pills and die with it.

im guessing that im carrying my heaviest cross since the latter ones. prolly im enjoying solitude and online games and had them my smiles :)

but i sucks that it adds up to my problems since its happiness package includes zits with it. [i have a big one right now at the most awkward place of my face]
yes. a pimple is still a problem. im still a girl. ikr.

i think i really need to see some psychiatrist or attend counseling before i get worse.
me prefer suicide than having to murder someone else than me though.
i now have this super talent of staring at the computer for 24 hours. congratulations.

101st post: summer epilogue




this post will be the over run of the thoughts i had since last week and of this moment

to be honest, nothing came that had me pretty well.

not even the coffee chats with macci, tea lattes with bebe, or roadtrips and beer sessions with my friends
maybe it kept me excited, or had me to smile for a while

but there was no fulfilment, rather hapiness to it

that stayed with me longer than sadness did.

my numbness had me gone feeling bliss as well.

now i cannot feel pain nor joy.

im a complete disaster.

of the ME that's seeing pretty small things and finding solid joy with it and literally crying over spilled milk.

i became the nightmare of my own dreams.

because of the mere wanting to become mature since everything had been childish to me.


i am now crying for reasons that i do not know.

this is me today.

i now cannot find reasons why i do because i always tend to forget painful things or feel if it did hurt at all.

ganon na ngaun. i cry, i ask why and the question remained still.

and it pains me more that seeing myself the same; and as much as i want to go back, i cannot. no matter how much i kill myself for it.

i hate explanations. period. but i am explaining right now because i think i'll go crazy if i dont.

TANGINA.

yun lang. gsto ko lang tlga magmura.

life's bitching me bigtime.

last february, i was making my death bilins because january was so perfect and i thought i was about to die for superb bliss i was having. before i knew it, i lose everything. not even my hands could try to catch them back to me
thats how unfair life had been kicking me.

not even my wildest nightmares. ATE. TANGINA TLGA.

i feel so sick of this everyday that i cannot look to people and taunt them 'sucks to be you' reason that MY LIFE SUCKS more than anyone knows.

im miserable. everyone that hates me can now laugh. shit you all.

i had been so dreamy all along, i forgot that not all dreams come possible.

not even expectations that you had since youve learned how to have them.


major thing that ran to me? [since exie days]
you can never change people the way you want them to.

fuck to that, i cannot even change what's happening to my life. because it wasnt me that could maneuver it.
and i cannot turn back time.

all i can is the possible power of accepting things and cry. worth while the tears are smiles.

but when can i look at the mirror with the same girl i had few months ago wearing a real smile, when she cannot feel happiness and pain of the numb girl staring back at her?


im sorry jihan. emo na ko ulet eh.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

i

sleep every 5am wakes every 3 to 4pm. im beginning to have an abnormal body clock.

this cant be happening.

not without nightlife.

OH NO.
im changing!
again.

Monday, April 20, 2009

i hate you blogskins. fuck you again.

Sunday, April 19, 2009

sabaw

luis azcona : nakahanap ka na ng van?
luis azcona : kelangan mo pa?
aiwa : ha?
luis azcona : diba naghahanap ka ng van for rent?
aiwa : ako? di ah
aiwa : kilala mo ba kung sino kausap mo? bka ibang aira lang yun tsong ^__^
luis azcona : HAHAHA! cge aaminin ko
luis azcona : di kita kilala
luis azcona : at di ko alam kung bakit ka nasa YM ko hanggang sa kinclick ko status mo
aiwa : baduy lui.
aiwa : ako kilala kita.
luis azcona : naalala ko na, ikaw ung kaibigan ni tiyano!
aiwa : oo sira.
luis azcona : hahahaha! sorry... lasing ako non
luis azcona : hahaha
aiwa : T__T okay.
luis azcona : seryoso? hindi ikaw ung naghahanap ng van?
luis azcona : sabi ko pa nga... "kilala mo makoy?":
aiwa : hindi.
aiwa : labo.
luis azcona : eh sino yon?!?!?!?!
luis azcona : hahaha
luis azcona : anyway... sorry
luis azcona : hahahaha
luis azcona : sabaw!
aiwa : abay malay ko
aiwa : SABAW MO gago..
aiwa : labo mo lui.
aiwa : suicide ka na lang.
aiwa : AHAHA!
luis azcona : grabe ka naman!
luis azcona : oo na! gets ko na
luis azcona : hindi ikaw yon!
luis azcona : hahaha!
aiwa : ahaha. joke lang
luis azcona : kelangan ko pa ba magsuicide para maconvince mo ako na hindi ka naghahanap ng van?!?!
luis azcona : hahaha
aiwa : HAHAHAHAHAH tama na nga nasasabaw na ko sayo. ge dude, bbye
aiwa : pplayplay muna ko
luis azcona : k bye. goodluck sa pgpplay mo. kung ano man yan. hahak bye. goodluck sa pgpplay mo. kung ano man yan. haha
aiwa : cabal
aiwa : para sayo tong stat ko
changes stat to: lui azconini sabaw
luis azcona : cabal?
luis azcona : wrong window?
luis azcona : ayon
luis azcona : nakita ko na
luis azcona : hahaha
aiwa : cabal. rpg thingy game
luis azcona : ahhhh...
luis azcona : sorry wala ako alam sa games
aiwa : AHAHA gay.
luis azcona : di azconini pangalan ko
luis azcona : hahaha
luis azcona : azcona lang
luis azcona : ginawa ko luisito azconini para italian!
aiwa : alam ko. bakit ba.
luis azcona : hahahaha
aiwa : gagu kilala nga kita.
aiwa : amp ka naman
aiwa : sige na. babayuuu
luis azcona : ikaw din kilala ko pero di ko alam apelyido mo okay?
luis azcona : haha
luis azcona : cge bye
luis azcona : gudluck sa cabal


lui azcona: owner of happy joey's studio and productions. band god (rather, fairy: jomel)'s buddy.
nirerespeto kita non. ngaun hindi na. HAHAHA :)) natatawa padin ako.
i have a new layout! :) wow. for 4 hours. not easy. still under construction ha. dont judge this yet.

YAY! i love you bloggie! your so black and pretty!




its 9am. i should really be sleeping now.

WANTED: 10 billion. any current of your liking.




i hate blogskins.

htmls suddenly became idiotic.

but however moreover

im actually pissed off as of the moment. but im cooling since im having a good coffee and ensaymada from goldilocks which panami bought.

i want to write something pretty and or interesting as of the same moment but my hands feel dirty weak. the 'tamad' feeling is now down to hands.



i think im growing lethargically backwards.

ooer. like benjamin button.

i hope i dont look aged, or maybe im 60+ (brad pitt loooks BETTER when he got 60+ right? he looks sooo highschool!)
...that cant be. im still a virgin. HAHAHA.

i dont have a laptop right now. it sucks.

now i have reason to read books. im always with the excuse of not reading (and re-reading) since ive learned to play rpgs and sleeping way nocturnals do.

i dont have a pc
my phone's dead (again, sorry folks)
im not taking summer class
im looking for a job
i will graduate not until 3 more years (if lucky)
and my constant buddy/roomate/cousin and i are having this gap.

now i feel miserable. yes.

im smiling.

im soo human. now i feel it again.

Saturday, April 18, 2009

something i lack:

sleep
and i really should be starting it.


but im too stubborn to listen to myself. gimik tonight at alchemy's. maybe il come. or maybe not. im just liking the homy feeling. plus its stress-free. (i hate waking up still wasted after night quests. plus hangover. bad day) AND. i want to feel this 'solitude' rather single-ness, boys free. WAOW. hindi ako malandi kill. =)YOU FUGLY FAT BITCH PRINCESS. you dont need a man.=)

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

back to business guys.

HELLO CIRCLE. we meet again.

after the endless weeks of not having my mobile on hand, here i am again. at your service.

kala mo makakatakas ka na after telling us ur on the rpg thingy geeky freak? not so easy aiwa.

man this day is COMPLETELY full. was it me or just the few weeks are dry empty? haha. emo guy. i was awaken by the intercom telling me to get RJ's laptop on the hall. she left it dead the whole midnight. di man lang na scared na people might get hers diba? scary. i got up next to head to the t&b and ready myself for the spontaneous activity for the day: ENROLLMENT.
wearing my trusty unif and flippy cap (shades not included in scene. naiwan ko kasi somewhere. 4 ang shades ko to mind) i dared myself to walk on the nose-bleeding-heat-stroke-baskil-causing sunny streets of noval. ang nasa isip ko lang the whole time i was at the streets, eto:
sizzing hot potato. whoa.

or something like fries cooking deep fried. GANON. ang inet. super. last month lang i was brr-ing with airom at the streets and cutting class but was just outside because i cant keep my nose from not-falling inside our classroom. and today. ang inet. haha! yun lang. after everything (it means the 2 hour not-exhausting-if-the-weather's-pretty enrollment) i went home kagad. because i am waaay too afraid people might see me and MIGHT pull me off to somewhere again. weak ako. sasama ko kagad eh. basta may good food or BOOZE. or kahit yosi lang. haha. :) and SORRY. dahil my fone was out of charge, i am now again INVISIBLE.. not! andrew came not nearly 30 mins of my invisibility to walk me out to some place again. he treated me with coffee eh. pano ko tatanggi. (told you im weak) plus i miss andrew.
aiwa: (kaharap si andrew) sitting beside andrew and him 'pissing' her off to come and join them on swimming at mico's. andrew pano kong bgla kong sinuntok balls mo?
andrew: puputukin ko boobs mo.
OMG. naimagine ko. ang morbid. HAHA. natawa ko.
andrew: siguro si billy sinuntok mo na balls?
aiwa: wla sya nun. :
more more:

andrew: (as the not-so-past sort-of-exie pass by with the exie-exie lover)gulo sorry!
shaking. mouth shaking while puffing the yosi dude. hands shaking. cant look at me in the eyes.

aiwa: LOL.

laughtrip si andrew. the ZAP! thingy again. happens to everyone i guess. kahit sa pa macho, pa-I-AM-A-GUY, toughie cookie sort of guys. pag dumaan ang x mo at hindi ka pa over, it will happen. no matter how you try to deny it, and un-bitter move on you try, YOU WILL ZAP and shrink like a pig fat cooked deep fried. and yes. its normal. :) okay lang yan drew

pagkauwi ni andrew: rpg thingy na sana kaso...

rhai came. ayoko na magkwento. maloloka lang kayo.

night: rpg thingy na sana ulet kaso i promised panami to come with her sa st lukes. so there.

WHY?! why are you not letting me PLAY!? its not geeky really naman eh. people there are nice. *hug

~~*
ANDREW: i am SORRY. that i cannot go with you kanina. im not at ease with the karen-you-miko tandem or any likey. especially miko. especially that he knows the exie and i think he's looking at me like a loser or something for going for the exie. sorry. paranoid thingy again. SORRY NA ANDREW. babawi ako. iloveyew :)

MAIAH: bwahaha. ayan kasi. bad ka kasi kya di kita pinapansin.

RHAI: ..pfft.

KILL: nagonline ako today to write you something, nothing came out i guess. sorry. pero i did write for something to read. i do think its readable. i miss you! :)

malandi nga ata si smuchee.

sorry kill. maybe it really is true. malandi nga ata ako. haha!






eh i cant help it. kahit san kita tignan kamukha mo tlga yung ex ko. LAAAST thursday (or was it thursday) i was all worked up and dreadly dirty, knailangan kong lumabas ng dorm to buy some detergent powder of any sort. habit to kill me, syempre nagyosi muna ko saglit sa labas. (*expression here* like omigosh or wtf or maybe tangina--di ko kasi malabas eh) nakita ko si before the previous exie. GRABE. ang cute nya. and and and. ang bango nya gosh nahiya ako. tlga super. sort of kwentuhan and stuff (napayosi ako ulet okay.) and it bleeds how much i have wasted for billy the bastard exie. tas si gio the before previous exie is sobrang cute. okay, probably bastard din si gio kasi 9 months na sila ng gf nya as of this week (he said so) eh duh? 9 months? nagddate pa tayo nun eh bastard. pero the HELL. ang cute mo tlga. yuck may fetish pa ata ko sa lampayatot kasi ang skinny nya grabe. haha! and may pgka perv sya. WELL ATLEAST. sabi nga ni macci. atleast at ease kang guy sya. well. may point. may point. o ayan kill. para naman may mabasa ka. HAHA :))

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

facebook quizzes suck

but was rather true.

Aiwa completed the quiz "Boplaks ka ba sa pagibig?" with the result :

Your Result: Isa kang Boplaks!

Cry_profile

Oo, Tanga ka lang talaga. Alam mo na nga na mali, Pinagpipilitan mo pa. Marami pa naman dyan pero dahil tanga ka nga ay sya na naging sentro ng solar system mo. Harap harapan ka ngang pinaglalaruan, nagtitiis tiisan ka pa. Magising ka nga katotohanan. Side dish ba talaga tingin nya sa iyo? Hindi ka nya pet para ganun-ganunin ka na lang ng mahal mo-- kung "mahal" pa ba ang nangyayari sa inyo. Goodluck na lang sa crying moments mo...LOL




hahaha. fuck yew.

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

bala ka kill, magsusulat na ko. haha!

let the world be gay.

rhai on alchemy gimik last friday:

ay kabog bakla! may bilat sa malapit sa pinto nagapapasupsop ng bubang! di keri mars open na open! pero yung guy *sings* I feel the adrenaline moving through my veins nalaplap na ni tony bakla bago pa si bilat.


tawa ko ng tawa. klangan ko tlga to ipost. iloveyourhai! u make my life gay! :)


gay is not a bad word. isnt bad too though. msyado lang ako naapektuhan siguro sa ka-gay-han ng ex ko. hahahaha :)

the best place for living.

me. bebe. chat. panami

last 2 midnights: someone from the upper floor cant sleep daw kya she sat with me and rj while we were too busy playing our addiction than hearing her story. pero i did listen no. kahit konti naman. mejo di msyado lang kasi i was having my quest. haha. she was ranting about her superficial roomate. she doesnt like her daw kasi her roomate's bratty and bitchy yada yadda.
she even came asking us if we still have some space on our room. GRABE HA. di ko sya pagpapalit kay panami and chat. we are a family. though gossips and reklamos have been on us made by our very dearest dorm household. who cares? we are happy. as long as they are there, i can call this hall of gossip a HOME. and to think, she's talking about her roommie behind her back, pano pa kung ka room pa namin sya? no way sister. so sorry.
chat panami rj. iloveyou! happy face :)

Sunday, April 5, 2009

TAGAY DE DIABLO

tournament 1 : hard drinkers
The best fucking tournament will storm manila!
Managed by the "TAGAY DE DIABLO" team!
A team of drinkers, undefeated.Earning money by doing what they do best.
Drinking.Is opening for these categories:
*Hard Drinker*Beer Drinker*Mixed Drinker*Beer Bonger

ARE YOU STRONG ENOUGH?
for details and registration
ABBIE - 09266331979
NIKKI - 09279797206


P5000 GRAND PRIZE P5000 GRAND PRIZE P5000 GRAND PRIZEP5000 GRAND PRIZE P5000 GRAND PRIZE P5000 GRAND PRIZEP5000 GRAND PRIZE P5000 GRAND PRIZE P5000 GRAND PRIZEP5000 GRAND PRIZE P5000 GRAND PRIZE P5000 GRAND PRIZEP5000 GRAND PRIZE P5000 GRAND PRIZE P5000 GRAND PRIZEP5000 GRAND PRIZE P5000 GRAND PRIZE P5000 GRAND PRIZETypo error on the pic.. sorry :P





cheers to us. lets all go to hell.

CABAL.


the girl on the center's my character, and the other two are other players i met at the game.
i was drunk the first time i played this. this is what boredom leads me to. pero i think its healthy, though so call unfortunate to my eyes. see. see. im not drinking everyday because of this. why am i sooo explaining? GRAAA.
so okay. when i first told bestie about the 'rpg' thingy, all he said was im beginning to lose the status quo and sink into the geek party. cme on. stay outside and drink? id rather wallow on my little hall and play with this game.

o look, here's what i got from playing:

1. i had been smoking less. like 3 to 8 sticks a day only
2. im sleeping more than 5 hours :)
3. im staying indoors. and having a healthy liver.
4. im eating less since im asleep the whole morning till afternoon. i wake up around 3pm and play continously (and since i cannot eat on midnight because of my curfew)
5. im not prone to cellphone radiation. (im barely texting)
6. im sleeping on my own bed (haha. hahaha. not on others bed or room or house)
7. im having virtual friends. (on the picture's my guild mates)
8. im spending more time with my lovely cousin, RJ.
9. and we are talking most of the time, so not to bore me.
10. im having less thoughts on problems *wink wink*
11. im hating the world less :)

im still thinking of other reasons yet... loading...

okay so im really dorky right now. PERO LOOK. im sooo having fun. parang game kasi sya sa psp that i have played before. please. dont judge me.

i still have my circle diba? DIBA CIRCLE BELONG PA DIN AKO!?
plus my virtual friends are really nice. hindi naman sila stalker mode.

magsisisi ako pag ganon. haha :)) kaya m not giving out my friendster.
BSTA. I LOVE THIS RP GAME. call me loser. id hate you. tae ka.

mr potato head. where are you???...

Friday, April 3, 2009

if

you blog more of yourself, youre selfish.
if you blog about the world, youre CORNY.
if you blog about other people, youre nosy.

if you think you are beautiful, you are self centered.
if you think youre not, then youre not confident.

if you dont speak out, youre no brainer AND you dont care.
if you do, then youre tactless and pakialamero.

just how do you fit in this bipolar world?

THE RICE BOWL.




http://natalinne.deviantart.com/art/Rice-Bowl-107239203


QUESTION: isang butil ka ng kanin, at kasama mo ang bilyon-billyong kanin sa rice bowl. after kumain ng bumili at nagluto sayo, ikaw lang ang natira magisa sa rice bowl. hindi ka nakain. ano mararamdaman mo?


RJ: uhm, wala. wala naman akong magagawa. tapos na eh.

Rhai:
wala akong pakialam kasi NFA rice lang sila lahat, ako, JASMINE! (?)
Me: eh pano nga kung itapon ka na?
Rhai: Edi emo na.
ah. ahaha. tangina. natawa ko. may sense? who cares?

Spyline: siyempre malulungkot.


sorry wla tlga kong mapost.
eto lang ata yung kahit papanong may sense na masshare ko.
i miss you blogging macci. i'll see u in puerto! :)




Monday, March 30, 2009

no need to cry though.

I kept myself solidly- EMO. i, without noticing it.
until jihan came to this blog and mention ANG EMO KO. i was just there, not surprised and muttered.. "oo nga noh."
i have been blankly BITTER. about the breakup.

and now i'll just stop. this is the last time i guess. i promise.

everytime he goes into me, ZAP! i sink. i kept sinking.

for 30 days, it had been that way. too sour. with or without tears.

God just kept giving me reasons not to cry or just feel alone. kahit yung mere moment to think of him (again) come on! wla tlga. ayaw ni God na malungkot ako. and i thank him for that.

im super close with him when im happy kasi. i dont pray when im sad. baliktad when it to compare with other people.

Last 2 Saturdays: last day of school.
everone's out. saturday night eh. everyone who's SOMEONE probably's out.
come on, im invited to 3 night outs.
i just dont have the money to make it sincei had been spending all week.
i gave everything for that friday. forgetting about SATURDAY.

and i dont feel like i am any someone to call. <-ang emo ko pa neto. okay?
so i was thinking of a saturday night alone (even my cousin was out eh. wla kong kasama sa room)
and just stay EMO-ish there.
BUT.
jom puzon again was there to save me. drve me to his house. had daddy drinks (and finish the bottle) watch dvd and not pass out.
i had a good time really.
like being back to your status quo, your friends.
and it feels good when its them that ur trying to please, then you'd just have a BOOBOO but they'll all just laugh because they find it CUTE.
there i knew they are my real friends. and i dont really have to be a pleaser, its when im real that they see me. that they have me. :)


Last Friday: not a happy period.
according to my hs bestfriend, im on my worst when i have.
i was sluggish and all.
my cousin and i are having a date, and i have to take an okay-pill so the whole dysmenorrhea thing wont hurt anymore.
had kidflicks, had arcade, i was all kid-like
it felt good. it was all cute. :D
as we were walking home,the emoish. (again) thingy's coming back
andrew lover txted me, booze again.
im spoiled kid.(they came from andrew's pa, picked me up and went home again)
had jose cuervo, had games, had laughs, had tuna (!) had rest before passing out had a good snore.
AND NOT HAVE A HANG OVER AFTER.


i had soo many reasons to record. do i need to be sad? i dont. i am not now.
do i need to cry? LOL. what's the point of crying?

i passed the whole reminiscing-thingy. congrats to you aiwa.

so jihan. hindi na ko magpopost ng emo blog okay?
wla lang tlga kong masabi na maganda as of today kasi I FIND EVERYTHING BORING. tara beach :)

happy.

so yes, maybe she's so GAGA that she quit her job because she cant drink at night.
pero maybe that's the idea of how she's different and she's keeping it. if you can realize how much she's wasting, you'll just laugh on it. she's crazy as hell and the hard core happy-go-lucky.
she's lucky enough to have that. you brave girl you. dont you ever cry?

Friday, March 27, 2009

very really reading much the sometimes read no-nonesense blog

puro ko 'very', 'much', 'really', 'sometimes' at 'no-nonesense' sa blog ko. why? ewan ko.


LOL

madaling makagetover,

madaling mamatay.

Thursday, March 26, 2009

situps-sit stress. tangina.

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

where's the spotlight?

im now shallow. im not empty. im now boring. im now not lying. im now bullshit-ing. myself. often.

"you cant have too many friends.."

well, beats me. this isnt the firstime i look at myself and laugh at that line.
you can. nothing is impossible with talk di ba?

you can have as many.
BUT
there will always be nights, mornings, and even the longest 10 minutes that you can record THAT YOU WILL FEEL ALONE.

and there's nothing wrong with that. i said to myself, i have soooo many friends yet i do not have one right now. someone came up to me and said, they have a life that wont include you.

which is true. i have a life that wouldnt include them also. like having my favorite book over coffee on a sunday afternoon alone.

funny how i made so many friends yet there are minutes when i feel like i dont have even one. a moment is forever. and so forever it will go to hunt me.

just so maybe that i am used to having around many people. too many to make me feel lonely. too many to feel alone. and now they are having their own time for their own life not including me, i feel... blank.

Monday, March 23, 2009

i speak too much

and i spoke too soon.
whyd you have to pretend its nothing when it really is. [im pertaining to myself.] whyd you have to break when you know you cannot do it. congratulations its been 3 weeks. what do you get. sadness. emptiness.

i will brag:i am a kid royalty. some one far beyond some expectations. and yes. i got it all from pretending. and too much socializing. im no fakers. but sometimes i dont feel like myself.im not popular; the term is a cliche. but i am known. of a few. big names. to small ones.issues claim me.

"she's this." "she's that.""she did this." "she did that.""she said this." "she said that"

i envy those who do not have any trail of gossips behind their tracks as they leave the school.
i guess its the con for being too sociable.
nothing is my fault.
i wouldnt want to end my day alone either. or sit on the corner while everyone's talking to someone.

i quite recall the nights where i feel the wind at my fingers over a roadtrip
kissing someone over a game
going to drinking session with people i barely know
and barely remembering their names.

yes. i think it was me who made this status.was it a mistake?

i still have a close group of friends. immediate ones who i can call when i am in need of help.
and a larger one for social needs.

i belong to the inner circle. one of my friend said it was "automatic".
one said if i were to die, the whole school would close for the day.

sweet. enticing. heart smiling.

the happiness is there. it's bliss.
you are at the prime of your life. you alone own the spotlight.
i do. i did.

then i saw someone. not far from who i am.
i cannot quite say if i was looking at him from below or at the sky.
the spotlight was too blinding; all i know is that he owns the lime light.
that looks like a spotlight too.

perhaps i was blind. or was i just not trying to see it. i was hypnotized

he began to move me. and so it takes two to tango. i danced with him, very gracefully. giving all efforts. i tried not to step on his feet. i always make sure he feels special. that he's treated the way he wanted. because i never want to stop dancing with him. i never want him to stop the 'we', the 'us'. i love the feeling. though it tires me.but as i was getting weak, i saw myself, trying too hard, paining myself. and i knew it wasnt right. i looked at him. he was unbelievably resting. all the minutes i was paining my feet in dancing.

i had to stop. i put the sounds off.

though i enjoyed the dance, it felt like a mistake.
i bruise myself, killed my feet
and tire my heart.
i was a pity. the spotlight shun at me. i was back to the lime light.

but the trail of gossips never left me. but it was a joke. i became a joke. everyone laughing and pointing at me. there, i lose myself. i lose the circle.

for going for someone in the lower light. for someone unpretty. for someone not bagay
the circle said it. i never looked at him that way. i was too fascinated. i was too blinded. too washed.


i hate to think that i stepped down on my stage for someone who would just take me for nothing. i felt used. i felt just an ordinary plaything. i felt like a trophy.

but do i deserve this? for deserting my circle? it was me. it was my choice to leave the circle and step down on my stage. it was me who put off my spotlight. everything was my faultand it was because i thought i would be happy.

the person whom i fell inlove with had become someone i do not know.

to now im trying my best to cope up. the circle was back again with the stage and the spotlight
but i feel sad.
i am not lonely; the circle was so tight they wont let me.

but my heart is crying. it is tired. but still wants to dance.

what pains me most? to him, its as if everything now is gone. he doesnt look sad. he doesnt look tired and most of all he's not sorry.

im sorry if i brag in this blog. hindi naman ako pa-popu. there are a lot of things that i do not know. but im a little flattered. little circle. i know i am loved.

why do i feel so much special to my circle?

was i really loved?
then why cant he?

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

you are still my sunset

I remember the day you first told me that
I was the man that had your heart
From that day forth I knew that nothing would
Ever come and tear us apart

So then people try to warn me about you
Said that I should never trust you
But so stupid so me I didn't listen then
I let myself go fall in love with you

(What happened to us)
You were supposed to be my future
Brought the ring and had to take it right back
(Were you really in love)
Or was I just a game to prove to yourself
You could get a me (yeah)

You're more beautiful than anything in this world
More precious than the rarest diamond or pearl
And even though we didn't work out together
You're still my sunset-set-set-set
And I know that you and I are two worlds apart
But you'll always be the one to have my heart
I'm gonna love you for now and forever
Cause you're my sunset-set-set-set-set

Your innocent smile used to drive me wild
Even though you ain't innocent at all
And now I feel so stupid cause I'm the only man
That ever loved you even with all your flaws
Even your best friend questioned why
I still would be with you after knowing your past
But what she didn't understand is knowing your past is why I thought we could last

(What happened to us)
We had something special but
What? Was I not good enough for you
(Are you really in love)
Can't show mine was fine
Cause without trying i still ended up hurting you (and I'm sorry)

You're more beautiful than anything in this world
More precious than the rarest diamond or pearl
And even though we didn't work out together
You're still my sunset-set-set-set
And I know that you and I are two worlds apart
But you'll always be the one to have my heart
I'm gonna love you baby now and forever
Cause you're my sunset-set-set-set-set

Maybe one day we'll end up talking again
Maybe one day we'll go back to being just friends
Promise to love you baby till my life ends
Cause you're my sunset-set-set-set-set

No matter what happened between me and you
I'll always be the man that you could run to
I loved you then I love you now and forever
Cause you're my sunset-set-set-set-set-set

Friday, March 13, 2009

HAHA daming sinabe

aira fleur is:



You Are Bold and Fearless



You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection.

You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive.

You have the classic "Type A" personality.



You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing.

You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long.

You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start.



You are wild, crazy, and a huge rebel. You're always up to something.

You have a ton of energy, and most people can't handle you. You're very intense.

You definitely are a handful, and you're likely to get in trouble. But your kind of trouble is a lot of fun.



You are loving, compassionate, and ruled by your feelings.

You are able to be a foundation for other people... but you still know how to have fun.

Sometimes your emotions weigh you down, but you generally feel free from them.



You are relaxed, chill, and very likely to go with the flow.

You are light hearted and accepting. You don't get worked up easily.

Well adjusted and incredibly happy, many people wonder what your secret to life is.



You are friendly, charming, and warm. You get along with almost everyone.

You work hard not to rock the boat. Your easy going attitude brings people together.

At times, you can be a little flaky and irresponsible. But for the important things, you pull it together.



You are a very lucky person. Things just always seem to go your way.

And because you're so lucky, you don't really have a lot of worries. You just hope for the best in life.

You're sometimes a little guilty of being greedy. Spread your luck around a little to people who need it.



aiwa:




You Are Bold and Fearless



You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection.

You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive.

You have the classic "Type A" personality.



You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing.

You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long.

You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start.



You are very charming... dangerously so. You have the potential to break a lot of hearts.

You know how what you want, how to get it, and that you will get it.

You have the power to rule the world. Let's hope you're a benevolent dictator!



nagiiba pala pag nagkakanickname ka... tulad ni louie...




You Are Smart and Curious



You are a seeker of knowledge, and you have learned many things in your life.

You are also a keeper of knowledge - meaning you don't spill secrets or spread gossip.

People sometimes think you're snobby or aloof, but you're just too deep in thought to pay attention to them.



You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection.

You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive.

You have the classic "Type A" personality.



You are wild, crazy, and a huge rebel. You're always up to something.

You have a ton of energy, and most people can't handle you. You're very intense.

You definitely are a handful, and you're likely to get in trouble. But your kind of trouble is a lot of fun.



You are friendly, charming, and warm. You get along with almost everyone.

You work hard not to rock the boat. Your easy going attitude brings people together.

At times, you can be a little flaky and irresponsible. But for the important things, you pull it together.



You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people.

You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts.

You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals.



You are relaxed, chill, and very likely to go with the flow.

You are light hearted and accepting. You don't get worked up easily.

Well adjusted and incredibly happy, many people wonder what your secret to life is.



You are well rounded, with a complete perspective on life.

You are solid and dependable. You are loyal, and people can count on you.

At times, you can be a bit too serious. You tend to put too much pressure on yourself.



You are a very lucky person. Things just always seem to go your way.

And because you're so lucky, you don't really have a lot of worries. You just hope for the best in life.

You're sometimes a little guilty of being greedy. Spread your luck around a little to people who need it.



You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing.

You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long.

You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start.



You are the total package - suave, sexy, smart, and strong.

You have the whole world under your spell, and you can influence almost everyone you know.

You don't always resist your urges to crush the weak. Just remember, they don't have as much going for them as you do.



tas magiging 'wi' lang sya:



You Are Enchanting and Artful



You are very charming... dangerously so. You have the potential to break a lot of hearts.

You know how what you want, how to get it, and that you will get it.

You have the power to rule the world. Let's hope you're a benevolent dictator!



You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing.

You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long.

You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start.



tska ni macci: (as jennifer)




You Are Level-Headed and Trustworthy



You are fair, honest, and logical. You are a natural leader, and people respect you.

You never give up, and you will succeed... even if it takes you a hundred tries.

You are rational enough to see every part of a problem. You are great at giving other people advice.



You are friendly, charming, and warm. You get along with almost everyone.

You work hard not to rock the boat. Your easy going attitude brings people together.

At times, you can be a little flaky and irresponsible. But for the important things, you pull it together.



You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people.

You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts.

You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals.



You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing.

You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long.

You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start.



You are loving, compassionate, and ruled by your feelings.

You are able to be a foundation for other people... but you still know how to have fun.

Sometimes your emotions weigh you down, but you generally feel free from them.



You are wild, crazy, and a huge rebel. You're always up to something.

You have a ton of energy, and most people can't handle you. You're very intense.

You definitely are a handful, and you're likely to get in trouble. But your kind of trouble is a lot of fun.



now as macci




You Are Powerful and Determined



You are confident, self assured, and capable. You are not easily intimidated.

You master any and all skills easily. You don't have to work hard for what you want.

You make your life out to be exactly how you want it. And you'll knock down anyone who gets in your way!



You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection.

You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive.

You have the classic "Type A" personality.



You are very open. You communicate well, and you connect with other people easily.

You are a naturally creative person. Ideas just flow from your mind.

A true chameleon, you are many things at different points in your life. You are very adaptable.



You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing.

You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long.

You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start.



why do people have to know who they are by seeking meanings in names when they can just atleast see things themselves. hay.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

i miss you. i miss having you. i miss myself with you.


tho i cannot much remember that you really cared for me, i just miss the everyday, mediocre to perfect, with you and without you in scenes, holding hands and walking home. i miss you so much. im not wishing youd have the same, we never were anyway.
wala din. puro kabitteran naman na tong blog ko. ewan myself. naging happy naman ako. range? uhm, 60-40. kahit na mas madalas pakong umiyak kesa sa matulog, ganon tlga. kakainis no? kung kelan naman ako natuto magmahal ng REAL, as in, saka naman hindi yun mabigay sakin. tangina tlga. o sya sya. ayoko na magbitter dito. pinahaba ko lang para naman hindi yung multiply nya yung unang bubungad sa blog ko diba? hay.

sabi sa blog ni pabs:
"Whatever it is you want, however you want to have it, no matter why you want to have it, you can have it faster if you can first be happy without it."


eh imposible naman na kong magkagusto sa iba. sana pla nung una pa lang, hindi mo na lang sinabing mahal mo ko. kasi hindi ko naman tlga naramdaman na totoo.

wow. saya naman ng neto


tamang tama ako sa reationship status. sakin pa nagpakita. tae. kung kelan hindi na kami. ARGH. sakit naman. eto na iiyak nanaman ako :( tae ka. lalaki ka lang.

pain

is eating me. very much invisible [as of mass people and of daylight], but it is. it takes pleasure on the depression thats me.
tangina much, ang emo ko. dati, airom the 'bestfriend's company's enough to forget. BEFORE wasnt deep, but wasnt easy either. now im needing half of my close-enough friends' effort just to get me through this-and still wasnt enough (!). i am pretty as i walk out home to school. sabi yun ng face ko. pero sabi ng heart ko: :""C *TEARS TEARS*

AND BEAT THIS: lagi ko syang nakikita, nung kami hindi naman. tangina. i had to swallow thyself just to save my sanity not to kneel at him and beg for him to come back. seeing him everyday IS hard. like our then-everyday routine of seeing each other and staying for minutes then saying good-byes. naiiyak na ko to now. i just had my private tear-shedding in case you want to know. just now ha. my birthday was fucked up. my friends WERE planning a surprise whatsoever pero tangina ng sky, hindi ka na lang nakisama. umambon ka pa. birthday mo rin ba!? tapos pinagsalubong mo pa kami. kung hindi ka nakiepal na umulan edi sana nakauwi ako ng maaga at hindi ko sya nakita. tas everyone was at home na nung dumating ang food......$%#@![edited: not to rant in this blog. i had soooooooooooooo much rants already and i think it is enough]

every night or in every uwian, i am to remember, to text, to wait, and so to get kilig or to get upset when i can or cannot see you after class.

and how can i forget the two-year life that i had; running where-else but to you. sabi ko nga sa post ko dati, i had been gyrating on him alone and feeling like there's nothing else i need. did i press on it too much? was i not better? was i not enough?

could someone bring me back my september boyfriend? i'm missing him :(




anyone save me. put my feet back on the ground.

Sunday, March 8, 2009

ugh,

im having my birthday.

and it sucks. my heart is damn broken. and to mind, im not open for another one. maybe not just yet. PLEASE. help me.


and i cannot face defeat. i never lose-well atleast the winning isnt profound. not very much winning-but atleast not losing. my life is fucked up, but well i guess, this isnt the first time.


i dont feel much of a loser now. having them make it impossible to make me feel that. God gave me too many responses to my ever eternal prayers-and sign asking. i ended with a sigh, and a smile. though very very very painful.

okay lang everything. atleast i get to experience it. how his love is, and maybe it just wont fit mine. no matter what and how i want it. it just isnt 'it'.

i still love you. but i'll forget soon- not you. i'll forget the pain, and the tears youve made me. you did made me a better person-a better stronger one... but now i'll just lie to my self and let me eat bitterness. because i love you so much and it hurts that 'we' are done, but i'll be okay soon. i'll go on with my life and be happy that it happened. and its what i really wanted anyway. my own dose of pill. good-bye love. i'll miss you. do not forget the 'us' that was US.

and i have a broken heart.

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

BLOGLEAVE.

i dont wanto talk. completely. id be okay. i know.

Monday, February 23, 2009

POT :)

wla nkong social life. minsan lang ako hindi magreply lalo na sa taong mga kailangan ako. i need them too though. but time doesnt.

"bawas yosi pot.. pwede ka naman ndi magyosi eh.. *oo na para na
akong tatay. hehe*"

-gian mendoza feb 19 2009 22:11:02
"Pot! Miss na ktaaaaaa! Tae"

-gian mendoza feb 21 2009 22:20:40

almost blog leave

im sorry. I REAAAAALLY wanto write, type, spill my rants here but TIME DOESNT DIDNT CANNOT PERMIT ME. i find it a crime to blog, eat, sleep. EVEN BLINK.

how cruel can this fashion show be? or was it my fault?

Thursday, February 19, 2009

ANAK KA NG PATOLA!

-bes chy

okay. all along akala ko patatas ako.

last.

"espasol ng pag-ibig. JEEEWK."


haha.

Monday, February 16, 2009

Titanic Two: The Surface

video

POINT IS. it has got no point.

first: yes, jack is angry, confused and sober because he's in a new world he never knew. then?

second: rose is dead. the trailer didnt show any new one.

third: its a big SO WHAT?! so what if jack's reincarnated from the frozen atlantic. so what if he's in newyork and troubled. the ending would be exciting but the whole lot has really really really got no point.

funny thing about this is that it came from 23 different movie including the titanic it came from. most of the cuts are from catch me if you can. the 'director's really really GOOD, creative and spontaneous. KUDOS! :D

walang sense.

POT MARUNONG NA AKO MAGBIKE
-gian mendoza, feb 15 2009, 10:34:43h

followed by: "PUTANGINA, MARUNONG NAKO MAGBIKE..." blah blah blah. something like that, still in ALL CAPS.

i cant stop laughing. i was on our LTS site and i look really dopey.

feb 15, sunday: 12 hours of hunger strike. did not sleep for and on the trip. troubled, bothered-EWAN. salamat sa House Bunny, Slumdog Millionaire, at Shaun of the Dead- Mejo nahimasmasan ako sa stress na iniiyak ko.

after LTS:
meet up potpot at ust. photoshoot for fashion with tanya and kim. masarap pala mag yosi sa field. thankyou sa arki week.
photoshoot more. ako ang 'subject' lover'slane lighting is divine. afterafter: icecream date. YEY. thankyou pot.

ako: pot, pano kaya kung mamatay ako. may marerealize kaya si billy?
pot: wala. magiinternet lang yon.
ako: HAHA. *sad face*


after pot:
meet up rangel and airom. YEY. i miss you airomBOI. jjampong noodles. YEY.



ang sarap ng buhay ko pag sila lang iniisip at iniintindi ko. promise.
no bitterness here. FOR REAL to.
pero wala eh. magdusa ka na lang aiwa.



this.blog.got.no.sense.

Sunday, February 15, 2009

"by wag mo na ko bigyan ng flowers ha. mdameng tao sa dangwa."

-ako






2009:
FIRST VALENTINES KO [after highschool] NA MASAYA.


2007: nag-eemo sa pagkawala ng friendship nmen ni airom AT sa sobrang malas ko, nalockan ako ng dorm. dala ko pa yung flowers para kay ate.



2008: nakitulog ako sa dorm ng isang guy kasi amoy alak at yosi ako kasi birthday celeb ni friend. at yung guy, loveteam sila ni friend. walang nangyari dahil kadiri, di ako ganon. PEROO. nagkagusto ako sa guy na yun and secret na yung iba. wala ng nangyari na dun.
dinitch ako ni james sison planned date namin. BUHAT KO PA ANG ISANG MALAKING BAG GALING TRAINING PARA LANG MAGMUKHANG MAGANDA PARA SA KANYA HA. and so ended up 'sort of' dating 3 other guys plus NIKIAHHH. masaya na sana. kaso ang gago ko, mahal ko padin si billy non at wala akong magawa.



2009: YEY. atlast. kahit nagaaway kami at hindi nya ko pinapansin nung time na yon kakainternet, natuloy na din ang pinakawiniwish kong: OVERNIGHT.
wala namang mangyayari. hnggang sweet na hug lang tlga kami at cuddle habang sleep [kahit minsan nakakainis na. hug LANG.] moving on, mga 2 oras lang kami nagsleep at bitin pa. hindi ko nga alam kung nakatulog tlga ko kasi nakoconcious ako kasi baka mag 'chainsaw snore' [sabi ni potpot] ako. bwiset. pero ang cute. KINIKILIG AKO. hee :D


ansaya saya ko kahit na mukha kong gaga sa picture ko at ang cute ni billy. bibi cute ka promise. hindi kita binobola. kahit ako lang ang nakakakita. okay lang yun. wala ko pakelam sa kanila :D

hindi ko alam gusto ko mangyare, gusto kong sabihin, kung malungkot ba tlga ko o masaya. EWAN YOU ALL. mageeLTS muna ko. *chee*

"LOVE IS NOT IN THE DESIRE TO SLEEP WITH SOMEONE,BUT IN THE NEED TO SLEEP NEXT TO SOMEONE."-MILAN KUNDERA [kinuha ko kay louie]

BILLY ADRIANNE MARTINEZ

i so love you. kahit na tae ka. abnormal ko kasi love kita. ee. sige na love mo na din ako :3

i love you retard boyfriend

Saturday, February 14, 2009

l♥vemuch





LOVE is patient, love is kind

It does not envy and it keeps no record of wrongs,
Love always protect,trust,hope
LOVE bears all things,endures all
things,believes all things,hopes all things
LOVE never ends








and perhaps it is love when he bends to reach you and when he can't its learning how to find a stride and stepping to it for your reach.

[or just when you have to kiss him but you realize you're too short -.-]

imissyouretard. ilysm ♥

Thursday, February 12, 2009

haha,

NATAWA KO!

pot was telling me about this chick his office mate hooked up with him. so there, pinakita ni pot yung girl thru fster, sabi ko pa i dont find her pretty, tas sabi ni pot "okay lang" sabi ko ampanget ng taste nga. WAHAHA. ang galing ko magsalita noh? HAROO.

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

parang wla lang akong klangang gawin

1.Who was your last 4 texts from?
- kish, airom, gianpot, pwet
2.Where was your display picture taken?

-macci's house.
3.What's your middle name?
-lim supposed to be. casiding for security status.
4.Your current relationship status?

-cn i say 'it's complicated?'
5.Does your crush like you back?

-hahaha.
6.What is your current mood?

-hungry
7.What color of shirt are you wearing?
-navy stripes.
8.If you could go back in time and change something, would you?

-definitely.
9.Where was the last place out of town, that you went to
- nueva ecija
10.Ever had a near death experience?
-nightmare. and almost got hit by a car.
11.Something you do a lot?
-blog
12.Who can you tell anything to?

-potpot. chy. rom
13.Name someone with the same birthday as you?
-makee and nico
14.When was the last time you cried?
-while ago.
15.Where are you right now?
-mess hall.
16.If you could have one super power what would it be?

-fly
17.What's the first thing you notice about the opposite sex?
-height
18.What is a quote that you believe?
-art is life. living is a lie.
19.Favorite color?
-blue
20.What is one thing that annoys you on Tv?
-cheesy scripted lines. very unhuman.
21.Do you still like kiddie movies?
-yup
22.What are you eating or drinking at the moment?
- none

23.Do you speak any other languages?
-english
23.What's your favorite smell?
- vanilla sweet scents

24.Describe your life in one word?
-mediocre. typical.
25.Have any tattoos?
-will.soon.
26.What are you looking forward to most of the time?
- shutup.
27.What are you thinking about right now?
-alot.
28.What should you be doing?
- a lot.

29.Who was the last person to make you upset/angry?
-who else. billy.
30.Do you like working in the yard?
- nope

31.What color are your nails?
- none

32.Do you act differently around the person you like?
-yes
33.What is your natural hair color?

- black
34.Why did you cry the last time you did?
- shutup

35.Have you ever intentionally made someone jealous?
-yea
36.What's something you're excited about right now?
- none

37.Honestly, do you see yourself as a slut?
- times.
38.Have you ever been in a long distance relationship?
- yes
39.What movie never fails to make you cry?
- none. i stop at one time though.

40.Do you still talk to the person you fell hardest for?
- yes. he even made me cry

41.Do you have someone of the opposite sex you can tell everything to?
- yes
42.What does the last text message on your phone say?
- kish came from taping bla bla bla.

43.Are you currently frustrated with a boy/girl?
- yes
44.Do you know who likes you?
- yes

45.Can you last in a relationship for 3 months?
- TAENG SURVEY SINAGUTAN PA KITA.

46.Look behind you, what do you see?
- chairs
47.Do you have good eye sight?
- yes

48.Have you ever made fun of anybody and later became their friend?
-yes
49.Do you think your mom has secrets she's never told you?
- yes
50.If someone went through your pictures would they find a "bad" one?
- ofcourse

51.Who was the last person that called you?
-unknown numbers
52.How is your room looking?
-mess
53.Do you fall for people easily?
-no
54.What is it you truly want right now?
-forget

55.Do you hate the last girl you had a conversation with?
- no

56.Do you know anyone with the same name as you?
- yes

57.What are you doing tomorrow?
- a lot

58.What was/is your worst subject in school?
- english.boring nuf.

59.What is the best eye colors on a member of the opposite sex?
-brown
60.What was the last movie you watched?
-7 pounds