Sunday, March 8, 2009

im having my birthday.

and it sucks. my heart is damn broken. and to mind, im not open for another one. maybe not just yet. PLEASE. help me.

and i cannot face defeat. i never lose-well atleast the winning isnt profound. not very much winning-but atleast not losing. my life is fucked up, but well i guess, this isnt the first time.

i dont feel much of a loser now. having them make it impossible to make me feel that. God gave me too many responses to my ever eternal prayers-and sign asking. i ended with a sigh, and a smile. though very very very painful.

okay lang everything. atleast i get to experience it. how his love is, and maybe it just wont fit mine. no matter what and how i want it. it just isnt 'it'.

i still love you. but i'll forget soon- not you. i'll forget the pain, and the tears youve made me. you did made me a better person-a better stronger one... but now i'll just lie to my self and let me eat bitterness. because i love you so much and it hurts that 'we' are done, but i'll be okay soon. i'll go on with my life and be happy that it happened. and its what i really wanted anyway. my own dose of pill. good-bye love. i'll miss you. do not forget the 'us' that was US.

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